NEGOTIATING YOUR WAY THROUGH LIFE
We all need negotiation skills
What do Presidents, housekeepers, attorneys, kids, CEOs and second hand car dealers have in common? They all negotiate in order to get what they want.
Negotiating your way through life. It all starts when you are born. A baby’s negotiating power comes from his mouth; when used by adults it is described as the cry baby tactic. Before adulthood you negotiate with your parents about pocket-money, getting toys or a scooter. It is then that you realize that size and power do matter. You develop skills and tactics. You will need those skills (and tactics) not only in a work environment, but also in daily living.
Especially if negotiating is part of your profession, you must know how to negotiate successfully. Know your style and that of the others involved in the process: are (only) reasonable negotiators involved? Are the negotiators competitive or non-confrontational? Does the relationship matter more than the stakes? What is it you want out of the negotiation? What is it the other party wants? What do they think you want? Determine your settlement range: the area between your best and worse case scenario. Preparation is a key element in achieving success.
Negotiating is about communication, effective communication to be more precise. Without listening attentively, which for the avoidance of doubt means stop talking and stop planning your response, effective communication cannot exist. Listening isn’t easy. It too requires preparation as well as a sincere interest in the other party. In order to get what you want, you need to know where the other person is coming from.
Karel Frielink
Attorney (Lawyer) / Partner
